Wednesday, May 7, 2014

Saved by Grace, Loved by God

     I admit that I am human and I make mistakes. In fact, I make a lot of mistakes. I am often irrational and act on what I am feeling in the moment. Being young and in college, I find that there are plenty of opportunities to make new mistakes. Young adulthood is often the time in a person's life where they make a lot of choices and must learn to suffer the consequences. It is a time in a person's life where they are presented with lots of freedom, as well as lots of responsibility.

     Although responsibility is often seen as a good thing, it doesn't always feel that way. When we fail to take care of the responsibilities we have been given we fail ourselves and must learn from our mistakes. I sometimes feel like I am in a dark place, but it is in that darkness that I also find comfort. God speaks to us all the time, but sometimes it takes us hitting rock bottom for us to really hear Him.

     The darker of a place I find myself in, the more I am humbled. It is when I am at my weakest that I am forced to cry out to God for help. Although I know that as a Christian I am called to be more I don't always do so. Rather than setting myself apart, I often find myself held captive to the ways of this world. I do not always reflect my faith through the way I live my life. I make the same stupid mistakes as many non-believers.

     Even though I am in no way perfect, God continues to love on me and pour out His grace over me. Although I do not always make the wisest choices, I know that I still have a Father who loves me and is proud to call me His daughter. I also have supportive friends who take care of me when I am at my weakest. They look out for me. Even though I do not deserve it, they continue to love me and show me grace through their own words and actions. Although I am a wreck, I also know that I am saved by grace and loved by God.

Sunday, April 27, 2014

Relationship Guidelines From Me to You


              Yesterday marked the two month anniversary of my relationship with my boyfriend. The beginning stage of relationships is often referred to as “the honeymoon stage” because there tends to be little or no conflict and those involved in the relationship are often blind to the other person’s shortcomings. Although this is often true, it is also important to recognize that the beginning of any relationship is important because it is the time where we really get to know each other on a deeper level. The first couple months lay down the basic foundation for what our relationship will look like from here on out. Here are a few things we do that you might consider implementing into your relationship with your significant other or even your roommates or other important people in your life.

Faith-Christ is at the very center of our relationship. Before we even started courting, we both openly discussed our personal values and beliefs. We agreed upon the importance of having God as the center and foundation of our relationship, also agreeing to never let our relationship with each other come before or get in the way of the personal relationships we both have with Him. We strive not only to further develop our relationships with Christ, but also to help each other grow stronger in the faith. Even before we started courting we began doing devotions together, praying together, and worshipping with one another.

Courting-We are not in a dating relationship, we are in a courting relationship. Neither of us is in this relationship because of a desire to “fit in”, to be loved, or to get something from the other person. We are both in this relationship with the ultimate goal of marriage, if it is the will of God for the two of us to someday get married. Not only this, but we are also both aware that to truly love someone means that you want what is best for the other person, so if things do not end up working out between us then we know that we must set each other free from the relationship recognizing that as being a sign that it was not part of God’s will for us to be together forever and that is okay too.

Genuine-We are both very honest, open, and genuine with each other. Before we began courting we both shared very intimate details of our lives with one another, not holding anything back. We each have a strong desire to be genuine with each other not keeping secrets, but truly sharing the deepest, most vulnerable pieces of our lives with each other. The discussions that come as a part of this are not always easy, but are vital to our relationship.

Respect-We each hold each other in high regard never intentionally putting each other in any situation that is uncomfortable. In order to do this we must maintain good, clear communication. If either one of us is feeling at all uncomfortable we openly talk about it, letting the other person know what is going on. We have respect for each other’s boundaries, never disregarding the feelings of the other person, but accepting them and backing down from any situation that makes the other person feel out of their range of comfort.

Trust-We both trust each other. Neither of us is selfishly needing to know where the other person is and who they are with at all times. If he lets me know that he is going out to a bar with a few friends, I never even think to ask which bar or which friends. I trust that he is faithful to me and the fact that he is willing to tell me what he is doing without my even asking really shows me that he is someone who I can trust. His honesty and open communication really helps me to know that I have nothing to be concerned about.

Love-We show our love through our actions, not just through our words. We strive to love each other the same way that God loves us; to love unconditionally, to be self-sacrificial, and to see each other through Christ’s eyes. We also recognize that we each give and receive love in different ways, so we do our best to express our love in various ways whether that be through physical touch, quality time, gifts, acts of service, or words of affirmation. These are all vital to making sure that we each feel loved by one another.

Space-Although we both enjoy each other’s company we also recognize that we each need our own space. Rather than being clingy and needy, we allow each other the time and space to go spend time with other friends, do homework, sleep, eat, ect on our own. Sure we might send each other a brief text throughout the day to show the other person that we are thinking of them, but we have no need to be with each other or in communication with each other all the time. Even when we are spending time with each other while in the company of others we often end up on opposite sides of the room. Although we’re still together, we don’t need to be right next to each other. We find our identity in our relationship with Christ, not in our relationship with each other.

Family-It is never too early to meet the family. The first words my boyfriend said to me after we made our relationship official was, “I can’t wait for my family to meet you!” Family is important to both of us, so we have made it a point of getting to know each other’s family from a very early stage in our relationship. [Plus, if you do not feel comfortable taking your significant other home to meet your family, then that person is probably not right for you.] Just two days after we officially began courting we spent the day with my dad. And a few weeks later we had Spring Break, so I went home with him to meet his family (both nuclear and extended). Yesterday I am was planning to take him to meet the rest of my nuclear family along with some extended family members, but unfortunately other things got in the way. But that is okay, it will happen soon enough.

I hope that this is helpful to others as you build upon your relationships with your own significant other, your family, your friends, your roommates, your co-workers, ect.

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

The Million Dollar Question: What is love?

In the Bible and in the world there are a lot of references to the word "love".

At weddings we often hear:
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails."-1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (NIV)

In Sunday School we teach that:
"God is love."-1 John 4:8 (NIV)

We've all heard the golden rule:
"do to others what you would have them do to you"-Matthew 7:12 (NIV)

Love is a word we use a lot in society. Just a few weeks ago, I had a family member pass away unexpectedly and have noticed myself telling people, "I love you" more often than usual. But what does this really mean? Am I just spitting out empty words? Am I only saying these words out of fear?

This all brings me to the big question; What is love?

As Easter approaches, I've been thinking quite a bit about the sacrifice Christ made for us sinners when he took it upon himself to die on that cross in order to save us. I read over and over again "Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends."-John 15:13 (NIV) Now don't get me wrong, I'm not requesting that you physically sacrifice yourself for someone else as Christ did for His people. But perhaps to sacrifice yourself in other ways, after all that's what this season of lent is all about, right? Sacrificing something in order to draw near to God.

Sacrifice can come in many different forms. Maybe for you this might mean setting technology aside to sit down and have a real, meaningful conversation with someone face-to-face. Or maybe it means sacrificing a few minutes of your day to call your parents, grandparents, or other relatives you haven't seen in awhile. Maybe this means taking the time to write a letter of appreciation to someone who has been a mentor to you. Perhaps this just means sending a text of encouragement to a friend.

Whatever you find best fitting, do it! Do not allow your words to be empty, but let them be backed up by what you do. After all, ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS. In this week leading up to Easter remember to love one another, just as Christ first loved you.

Do not love with just any kind of love, but with an agape type love. Love which is far-reaching, self-sacrificing, and unconditional. The same love which lead Jesus Christ to suffer on the cross in order to purchase our salvation. While other types of love are based upon feelings, agape is a choice! Agape type love is a decision to love knowing that every person is priceless in God's eyes. It is a way of allowing God to love others through you and to use you to be "a light to the nations" just as Christ was.

I hope you really ponder this question for yourself; what is love? Pray, asking The Lord to open you up to hear from Him and you might just be amazed at what He chooses to reveal to you. I wish you all many blessings and much peace as we near the end of this Lenten season and enter into Easter.

Sunday, October 13, 2013

Crazy year or so...

     I realize that it has been well over a year since I've posted a new blog. I apologize, my life has just become so hectic between moving out and starting college, working, volunteering, meetings, physical therapy, counseling, and other various appointments appointments. For over a year I was on a crazy diet;

Ø  Restrictions

o   Food high (above 55) on the glycemic index (www.glycemicindex.com)

o   Unacceptable Sweeteners (agave, sugar, aspartame, or sucralose)

o   caffeine (yes, this does include Chocolate)

o   Processed foods

o   No more than 3oz of animal protein 3x a week (protein portion should fit in the palm of your hand)

o   No cashews

o   No shellfish

Ø  Okay to eat

o   Foods low (below 55) on the glycemic index (www.glycemicindex.com)

o   Acceptable sweeteners (coconut sugar, raw honey, stevia, and xylitol)

o   Homemade iced tea (decaf, unsweetened or using one of the acceptable sweeteners listed above)

o   Whole grains

o   Most organic fruits and vegetables (see glycemic index)

Ø  Needs

o   Normal serving size

o   5 small meals per day

o   1/2tsp of cinnamon daily

o   For every serving of food I eat, I need to eat two servings of fruits and vegetables
On top of that, I was taking 30+ medications...it was ALOT. And none of it helped me any. So on September 27th one of my doctors let me go off my diet and all my medications! Unfortunately she also referred me back to physical therapy because of my spinal misalignments, plus my tight muscles and tendons. Anyhow, aside form that not a lot has changed. I've had a headache 24/7 for the past 6months or so, but you get used to it so it's not too miserable.

Monday, May 2, 2011

Osama Bin Laden Dead

I know that for many people this is a time of celebration, but as for me, I believe that it was a stupid move on our part. As Americans, we often times speak of being peace makers between different countries, but why then do we celebrate Bin Laden’s death? Sure, I understand that he did quite a bit of wrong, but who are we to judge?
In his time God will judge and he will deliver fair punishment. I think it’s going to prove to be a horrid mistake for us. Why do we somehow believe that we should re-pay evil for evil? Especially, when we claim to be peacemakers, not only are we going to further upset Al-Qaida, but now were probably gonna get nuked for what we did. And I hate the way that people are practically dancing upon his grave. It’s disrespectful and very much upsetting.
I understand that for some it does stand as a mile-stone since nine-eleven, but to take it as a victory is just wrong. Why are Americans so proud of murder? It’s down-right disgusting. I don’t care how awful of a person he may have been, a person is still a person. It very much upsets me how people are reacting to this news. Is killing him really going to bring healing to anyone or bring loved-ones back, I don’t think so. So why are people taking this tragic event as such a “mighty victory”?
Don’t get me wrong, September 11th, 2001 was a very catastrophic day in the history of our country, but it shouldn’t give us any right to take the life of another man. It’s very disappointing to me that so many people seem to support the belief that his murder can somehow be justified because of his actions. I don’t understand why people find it so necessary to fight flame with flame. People need to open there eyes up and realize that this day we should be hiding in fear of what is to come, because as we all know, this is just the beginning of a long bloody battle. And if we continue to throw more flames the fire is only going to grow.

Monday, April 11, 2011

Another Amazng Week in Mexico

As many of you know I have spent the past 10days (March 31st-April 9th) in Mexico for Maple Valley Presbyterian Church’s Annual Mexico Mission Trip. To be honest going into the trip I wasn’t really sure why I was going back to Chihuahua, Mexicali. Last year there was a 7.8 earthquake while we were there and it was a very terrifying experience from me. I believe that it put a handicap on me last year and I didn’t really connect with anyone while I was down there because all I could think about was that traumatic incident that occurred the first day we were in our villages. But that last day I was down there one of the woman from the church asked me to return and over the past year I realized that the only way to truly conquer my fear was to go back to the place where it happened. I was very nervous to be returning because I was afraid that all those bad memories were going to come flooding back to me as soon as we pulled the vans up into the church in Chihuahua.

Our flight left the Sea-Tac Airport early afternoon on Thursday and surprisingly enough had no delays. We had a short layover in Sacramento, California then headed on through to meet up with the rest of the group in San Diego, California. We loaded up our 15-passenger vans, cargo vans, sprinters, party vans, and trucks and drove out to Fletcher Hills. That evening we all got settled in did a quick worship service met in our accountability groups for a short bit then headed off to bed.

The next morning we woke up and I packed my things and headed out side where some of the adults were gathered drinking their Starbuck’s Coffee and trying to get things organized for the day. Awhile later we headed down to the chapel and ate breakfast and made our sack lunches for the day. While there David, Erik, Eric, and I spent a few hours talking to a really cool 23year old guy named Mica who was at the church watching over us and taking care of any problem that arose (like when the Maple Valley guys clogged the toilet, so typical). We talked about the difference between Washington beaches and California beaches and how liars go to L.A. (inside joke, please don’t take it offensively). Then we did a short devotional, some village time, and spent some time going over our vacation bible school plans with our translators.

Afterwards we loaded up everyone’s luggage once again and headed off to a nearby mall (after having to jump the blue van) for an hour to do some last minute shopping. Then we went to the beach for like three or four hours, where we ate lunch and walked the boardwalk. Ashley got an okay from her parents and our youth directors to get a new tattoo and I had heard that there was a tattoo parlor near the boardwalk so we checked out one of the stores where we got a great deal on some swim-trunks and ran into Anna and Lindsey. The four of us found the tattoo parlor and checked out some gages for Anna, but they were way over priced so none of us ended up getting any tattoos or piercings there. But we found an ice cream/snow cone/ milk shake place right by the tattoo parlor so we got some snow cones and headed back to where the rest of our group was on the beach. There we found everyone standing around where Katie was laying in the grass in the park that was attached to the beach. She was being a human sacrifice (that’s when you lay down and someone covers you with goldfish crackers or some other sort of food and the seagulls swarm you like crazy). After quite some time Tyler army crawled up by her feet and we told her there was a seagull right by her feet and then Tyler grabbed her foot and she jumped up screaming and scared all the birds away, it was hilarious. After that we loaded up into the vehicles for the drive over to El Centro (during the drive, when we were passing the casino, Bodwell got a call saying that we needed to go through a different border crossing than we usually do (which we thought was an April Fool’s joke at first) and we were told that a representative from Azusa Pacific University would help us through customs) where we unloaded our luggage, once again. We ordered a butt-load of pizza’s (as Bodwell would say) for dinner and had some worship time (while Anna corn-rowed my hair and we talked about letting go of expectations) burned papers that we had written our expectations on, and went to bed.

The next morning we woke-up, packed our things, loaded up the vehicles and headed over to The Golden Corral for breakfast. Advanced team headed out to tent city in Cuernavaca, Mexicali to set-up all of our tents and get a water drainage system set-up for us to brush our teeth from the water coolers and all that good stuff (because when the dirt there gets wet it’s really not very much fun at all). The rest of us stayed at the church for a few hours (where Danii and I got very much acquainted because of my water spritzer and we became attached at the hip from then on) and did a Wal-mart run and then headed down to the border crossing where we spent an hour or two (yes this does include the time it took to jump the blue van…AGAIN!) getting everyone through customs (well everyone, but David and Deliah, two of our translators, who went to the border crossing we usually pass through, where they just stand and wave to you as you pass through, because David lost his passport). Do you know how hard it is to fill out all those custom forms when they’re all in Spanish? YIKES!!!

Anyhow, we eventually got to tent city which was surprisingly small. It was such a big shock (going from over 1,000 people there to about 100) that when we arrived Madi and I just held each other crying and speechless because we didn’t know how to react. The fenced off area where the staff usually sleeps contained everyone in the whole camp site and that was a huge shock for all of us returners (so much for getting rid of expectations). That night we ate the dinner that Azusa had prepared for us and went to chapel where we were introduced to Jack (leader of Barnabas aka toe-touch fanatic!), Joel (the worship leader for the week, no Peter Neumann?), Joe (the pastor for the week-who happened to make A LOT of Frances Chan references), and Anna (one of the coordinators from Azusa who was basically running the whole week and has super cute kids!). We went over Azusa rules (7meals-8chapel, drink lots of water, wear clothes toed shoes, be quiet after lights out, ect). We’ll let’s just say there were a lot of Maple Valley kids that were not all too happy with the 10:30 lights out time and made that very clear throughout the week (lights out used to be at 11pm).

The next morning we woke-up at 6am to get ready for the day. It was very different being waken-up by Jack and Anna coming around yelling at us to get out of bed instead of Fernando (past barnabas leader) coming on over the loud speaker saying, “good-morning Cuernavaca!”, and telling some jokes and then blasting like five songs over the speakers throughout all of tent city. Anyhow, we got up, used the honey buckets (which was really strange having only fifteen bathrooms for the whole camp, when were used to having about eight to ten for just Maple Valley, just goes to show just how much our group made up tent city) and did whatever else we needed to do for the day. We got breakfast at 7am and started chapel at 8am. When chapel was over around 10am we did some quick devotion time and then divided out amongst the vans to head into our three different villages (Chihuahua, Ocho, and San Diego). Those of us going to Chihuahua continued our on-going tradition/battle to steal signs from Barnabas and we were successful as usual (later on in the week we tried to kid-nap jack-jack, but he was too fast for us).

When we arrived in Chihuahua there were a few church members gathered outside awaiting our arrival. We went to set our backpacks and water bottles down inside the back room of the church, and realized that it looked very different. There were pictures of children on the wall and an attendance chart indicating that they had finally started up a children’s ministry (TOE-TOUCH!). It was awesome to see that we have had that much of an impact on their community! We messed around with the kids and talked to the adults for awhile, and it was hilarious to see Caleb (one of our translator’s one year-old son) seeing a dog for the first time. After an hour or so more people started arriving at the church and we gathered inside for service. The band (Pastor Efron, music leader/director (who’s name I can’t remember right now), and 17-year old Nadia) got up and started worship. After a few songs Nadia handed her drum sticks over to Bodwell for his turn to play drums for the last couple songs(also, an on-going tradition). Then, Pastor Efron prayed and invited Bodwell up to give a sermon. When service was finished and we were all dismissed, we headed out side where some of the adults had prepared some freshly home-made tacos for us (fresh beef, guacamole, pico de gio, and tortillas, it really doesn’t get much better than that!). After lunch, we went inside and took a siesta, then divided up into our VBS groups and went around the village passing out flyers to advertise for our woman’s ministry and vacation bible school.

After that we meet back at the church, loaded up the vans and headed back to tent city (after a quick store-run at Super Cuernavaca, of course!). Surprisingly enough, we were one of the first groups back to tent city and had a few hours to hang out and play card games, catch-up on sleep, and hit up the vendors (and Shay fixed the blue van so that we wouldn’t have to keep jumping it). Eventually, more groups started coming back and 7pm rolled around, so we went to get dinner and sat around waiting for worship to begin at 8pm. After worship we gathered to debrief our day, award barnababe and barnabro, and get into affirmation groups (where Danii brought up that I was her “shot of happiness” and we discussed breaking down our walls and letting God and others into our lives). We got ready for bed and went to sleep. The next morning was pretty much the same routine except for when we were in Chihuahua we had woman’s ministry in the morning (the guys cleaned-up a park while we were serving the woman) and we ate the sandwiches that Azusa had provided for us for lunch and had VBS in the afternoon, with siesta at the end of the day. And everything else after that was pretty much the same as the previous evening. From that day fourth that was our schedule; except for we had church service after siesta and didn’t get back to tent city until about 7:50pm, and there was one morning when a few of us woke-up early to set-up for and serve breakfast.

We had a couple gang fights that we had to break-up during VBS every day, but they really weren’t too bad because it was the younger kids that were involved and our translators stepped in to settle the disputes right away. There were a few days where we just played with kids in the park in the afternoon and many children skipped school just to be with the boys and help clean-up the playground in the mornings. I didn’t really connect with any of the kids until the second day of VBS, when Arely invited me to come jump-rope with her and she rarely left my side after that. The next day she drew me a picture, folded it up and handed it to me pinned together by two sparkly-pink heart-shaped hair clips, and when I unfolded it there was a drawing of the two of us and in the corner it said “Robin, gracias for ser miamiga Robin I love you Robin” and right then I knew that I had made a difference in her life. Later on, we were jump roping and this little cross-eyed girl named, Jennifer, came up and wanted to jump rope, but when she tried…well, let’s just say, she didn’t quite know what she was doing. So the other girls tried to be patient with her, but they were getting very frustrated.

Good thing it was about time to go inside for VBS, but when all the children started lining up outside the doors of the church I watched as couple boys kicked her out of line and started yelling and making fun of her and she ran off to cry. I ran after her and even though I don’t know Spanish, I somehow managed to calm her down and convinced her to join everyone else inside the church. During craft time I helped her make a necklace with a cross on it and when we finished I put it around her neck and her face just lit up with pure joy. The day after that was our last day in Chihuahua and Jennifer never showed up to VBS, but Arely was there and we made each other tons of drawings. At the end of VBS she came and handed me a picture of her that we had taken on the first day of VBS, so I ran into the back room and grabbed my 10th grade school picture out of my wallet and handed it over to her.

Apparently, sometime that day, David, Lofy, and Brian decided to go over and talk to the guys who lived in the nice house, right next to the church, because they had heard that the people living there weren’t Christians. But they guys were drunk when David, Lofy, and Brain arrived, but they still tried sharing the story of Jesus with the men and I guess it turned into some kind of huge argument of them throwing bible verses back and forth at each other and it turns out that they’re like Satan worshipers or something like that and they started casting demons spirits upon them and one of the guys had a hand-gun in his back pocket so David, Lofy, and Brain started praying like crazy and were able to get out of their just fine. I think it’s kind of funny though that David was there and that he was the one who originally wanted to go talk to the guys because David wants to be a pastor when he’s older and his absolute favorite biblical topic is spiritual warfare, so I think it was a good experience for him to see what it was like to be in the middle of that kind of a situation. And for all three guys (David, Lofy, and Brian) it brought them closer to God because they had to trust him in that situation and he really pulled through for them that day.

Later that evening we threw a big BBQ to celebrate pastor Efron’s birthday, Mark (one of our construction worker’s) birthday, and Alison (one of our youth interns) birthday. At the end when we had to say good bye almost everyone from both Chihuahua and Maple Valley were all bawling our eyes out. Arely was giving me a big hug and at one point I thought I might not ever get away from her tight grasp. As we were about to leave I was sitting in the back of the blue van with the rear door open and Arely came running up to me, took off the necklace she had made the previous day (the same one that I had helped Jennifer make), and handed it to me. And she just stood there while I sat in the back of the van, both of us crying and holding hands for what seemed like eternity and then she let go walked away, I closed the van door and we drove off while all of the children ran to the end of the street chasing after us.

Danii and I sat in that van crying the whole drive back to tent city and we cried all throughout dinner, and chapel. That night David had to jump the boarder so we were all praying for him like crazy (which was extremely successful and he had no problems whatsoever and Deliah was able to pick him up on the other side). Madi and I switched tents that evening, so that Danii could remain attached to my hip. We spent our final night in tent city, woke up the next morning, had bimbo donuts and bananas for breakfast, watched the rain fall for a bit (half hour tops), and gazed at the double rainbow that appeared in the sky, then we packed up our bags and headed back to California. On the drive, from the border crossing to our hotel, it started snowing when we were driving through the mountains, which seems ridiculous considering that it was about 102 degrees when we left Mexico and about 89 degrees when we got to our hotel. Anyhow there really isn’t much more to say then that.

In California we all got to take our first shower in days, Lauren and I spent about three hours at Jamba Juice trying to get all our affirmations finished, and for dinner that night Eric, Erik, David, Steven, Shane, Lauren, a few other people, and I went to Denny’s for dinner. Our waiter told David that if he ate over 20 pancakes he could get his meal for free, so David tried and did very well until Eric decided to take his shirt off at which point David almost threw-up and definitely lost his appetite. Over all I’d say that it was an awesome experience and I’m glad to say that I could share Jesus’ love with people who didn’t even speak the same language as me. It just goes to show that love truly has no bounds. Oh, and just for the record the flight attendants that we had for all three flights (we had a layover in Las Vegas and another layover in Reno)on the way home were hilarious (I felt bad though when not all the doors were latched closed so when we took of all the ice and soda went flying into this poor guy who was being pressed against other storage compartments because he didn’t have his seat belt on for take-off, since there wasn’t enough time for his to get back to his seat between giving emergency instructions and lifting up off the runway). I can’t wait for next year!